figuring out anxiety

Good evening

Hey guys i no i havent written in a few days, lately i just have no motivation to do anything, i skipped college on wednesday because i just couldnt be bothered to go in, when i was with my boyfriend i wanted to do something but i couldnt be bothered to do anything, i dunno i wanted to get out the house and go somewhere but there is nothing to do where i live, i couldnt be bothered to go to the shop, play the wii, lay in bed, or even watch a movie, i dunno what i wanted to do i just no i couldnt be bothered to do anything, if that makes sense, i just have no motivation lately, i feel like i wanna go back to my therapist and scream for him to help me even though nothings wrong! I got a call from a spa 2 days ago that want to interview me and i was putting off calling them because as much as i want a job i just have no motivation to go get one and i cant be bothered to get out of bed, i did call them back today and i have an interview with them next thursday at 9am.

I think its because i keep getting dizzy, alot, ever since my dr put on back on the pill my dizziness has been worse, i would say all this less of motivation is hormones but i havent taken the pill in 2 days because its making me dizzy, but then again i might be dizzy because im laying around in bed all day watching movies on my tablet, giving myself a head ache, yet im to scared to do anything or go outside or go shopping in case i get dizzy, i want a job but im to scared to get one in case i get dizzy at work and nearly faint or something, now i dont no if its to do with anxiety as well, maybe its taking over again, maybe its my anxiety making me afraid to go outside in case i get dizzy, so instead i stay inside and do nothing but be afraid to be dizzy.......that actually makes alot of sense, its like history is repeating itself but with something different, with my eating issues i was to scared to eat in case i choked, this time im to scared to go outside or do anything but lay in bed in case i get dizzy. 
And now lack of motivation makes sense, its not lack of motivation....its me being afraid to do anything in case i get dizzy and nearly faint, its me letting my anxiety take over my life like i let it take over before.

My dr said that if the dizzyness gets to the point where it stops me from doing everyday things in my life then to let her know and go back.
My therapist said if i ever relapsed back to not eating because i was scared then to always remember our sessions i had with him, i think i have relapsed but not with eating, with being dizzy, to scared to go outside coz im dizzy or do anything in case i get dizzy, letting my anxiety take over coz im scared. when i had the eating issues i was in a cycle of being scared and scared to eat which my therapist got me out of by doing the one thing i was scared of, eating, now im back in a cycle to scared to go outside in case i get dizzy and when i got outside i get so anxious that i make myself dizzy so i go back inside.... see im stuck in another cycle that i need to get out of, and i hope i can do this on my own without the need for a therapist.

So im gunna start going outside more and stop caring about being dizzy, im gunna go to my interview with a positive attitude and im gunna stop lounging around in my bedroom feeling sorry for myself, even though im scared sometimes taking a jump is the only thing that will get you out of your cycle.
Sometimes being scared is okay, it will push you to do the right thing because you dont wanna be scared any more so you gotta take the jump and do what you no is right.

Thanks for listening, if you ever need a chat dont be afraid to email me.
Take the jump.
Pearlbeauty01